The Tough Times
by what-if-joana
Summary: Lorelai found a way to handle the impact of the news Rory had broken to her. She set out plans to become one big, happy family, but the picture perfect family was not meant to last. History repeated itself and left half the family heartbroken, while the other half struggled to take life into their own hands. Healing takes time and some wounds might never be healed. Post AYITL.
1. Chapter 1

**First Chapter: A Moment To Take It All In**

Lorelai was taking everything in. She looked at the details, which made the wedding location as special as it was; the twinkle lights, the decorations, which Kirk managed to put just perfectly into place, the couch, the richly decorated tables, and the flowers all over the place. It felt like a fairy-tale. The destination after a long rocky road, which Lorelai and Luke had to get through to finally reach this paradise.

It was a memorable moment. The emotions overcame her when Rory herself said she wanted to take it all in, remember it all, every detail. She was touched that her daughter felt just as strongly about the wedding as she did. Rory was truly happy for her, and Lorelai was tearing up. Something she thought she would do all day long anyway, so why not start right away?

However, what Lorelai didn't know was that Rory meant she wanted to take it all in before sharing news, which would make this change permanently. After hearing this news, Lorelai couldn't go back to look at her surroundings the same way as before. It changed everything, forever. Every detail she had looked at with such adoration just a moment before was now a sour reminder of the conversation she had to face with her daughter.

Her wedding location would always be the place she'd hear two words she thought she'd never hear, at least not under these circumstances. When thinking of the flowers in the Gazebo, she'd always instantly remember the two words, which made it clear to her that her daughter had lost a grip on her life. Rory was headed in a direction, which mother and daughter had never envisioned.

Big words were floating around in Lorelai's mind. Big words, which indicated questions, but one sounded sillier than the other. But she had to ask them anyhow. She had to react to the news in some way, so she asked the words one by one, question after question.

"What?" Lorelai had to hear the words Rory had spoken once again. But still she couldn't comprehend them. Pregnant. Rory was pregnant. Her daughter was pregnant. It was a surprise, which caught her off guard; Lorelai didn't even know Rory was seeing someone at the moment. Which lead her to question number two.

"How?" Rory scoffed at the question; she was the living proof that Lorelai knew how reproducing worked. But the question entailed the claim for different basic information, which Lorelai voiced by asking another question.

"When?" It included both, how long did she know, and when did it happen. Time was a big issue here. Lorelai couldn't believe Rory was able to keep a secret from her. It led her to the final question.

"Who?" Lorelai watched as Rory looked down to her lap, kneading her fingers, working up the courage to tell her, who the father was to the unborn child. In fact, Rory wasn't sure who the father was. She couldn't remember the last time she had seen that Paul and the other option, Logan Huntzberger, was about to get married to another woman. One option was worse than the other, but Lorelai didn't voice her concern.

Instead, she gripped the champagne glass tighter. She was indeed good at finishing off the bottle. She remembered now that Rory only had sipped at her glass, hardly taking a proper slug of alcohol. She didn't even remember topping Rory's glass off, but Lorelai had been more focused on taking it all in, eyeing the man she vowed to share her life with. The man, who would always stand by her side. And this man would soon hear the news she was still comprehending, still getting the ugly details about.

As Rory talked, Lorelai couldn't help, but wonder whether this conversation would have taken place at Weston's if the bakery was open this early. These kinds of talks were always the ones Rory was eager to have at Weston's. Big news was best served with a cup of coffee and a piece of pie. Oh boy, Lorelai longed for a cup of coffee, but the champagne did the trick too.

Overall, the circumstances for this pregnancy weren't ideal, but Rory pointed out that they weren't ideal when Lorelai had her. Lorelai sighed when she heard that. But Rory insisted upon it. "If it worked out once for a Gilmore Girl, then it could for another."

As they talked about it, Lorelai noticed that all Rory really needed was someone to talk to, to listen to, and to get support from. She needed a partner on this, but Lorelai was her mother, and her best friend. Both of these people would ask inconvenient questions and would point out weak points in her plan. Both, mother and best friend would show her other options, help her to decide on the best one and would then support her throughout the process.

"Did you do one of your pro-and-con-lists?" Lorelai asked suddenly. She sensed that Rory's mind was already made up and there was no point of talking it all out anymore. She seemed set to have the child.

"I won't have an abortion, Mom. Because I don't want the life I leave behind with having this child. You've seen me struggle. I tried hard to become a journalist and I _was_ for some time. It was good, but it's not where I should be. At least not anymore. Having this child gives me perspective. I know it's not a job, well it's a full-time-job obviously, but not a job which makes money. But this forces me to change things, to do something. While having an abortion doesn't make me change anything. And I don't want to go back to the life I had before. I mean there's nothing left of it. I don't have any writing jobs at the moment, that Logan-thing is over and Paul... I don't want to be that Rory anymore. With having the child, I will have to pull myself together and I'm ready, Mom. I'm ready to-"

Lorelai placed a hand on Rory's shoulder to stop her rant, her monologue of truths. She spat it all out in one go, the real problems in her life. It hurt Lorelai to see her daughter like this, hoarding these feeling inside her, when all which should be inside her, was a bunch of cells growing to become a human. All of Rory's energy should be bundled to have a healthy baby and not used up by worrying about the circumstances.

"Thanks for listening, Mom." Rory finally said. She shifted in her seat, sitting straighter than before, taking deep breaths.

"No problem, kiddo." Lorelai tried to give her a promising smile; a smile, which should comfort her. She didn't want her baby to worry too much. It stressed her out when Rory was stressed out.

"You should probably stop calling me that." Rory chuckled at the comment, it was almost not audible, but her lips curled up to a tiny smile as well.

"Why? You'll always be my baby." Lorelai frowned. Nothing could ever change the fact that Rory was her kid, her only baby.

"Even though your baby is having a baby herself now?" Rory asked her warily.

Lorelai felt uncomfortable with the question. It was new territory, which yet needed to be discovered. She was afraid of the unknown, but as soon as she looked into the eyes she gave to her daughter she saw a glimpse of hope and something like assurance. "Things like that don't change, you will learn that someday."

Rory nodded and let her gaze wander back to the wedding decorations. They sat some more in silence and took everything in again, all the details, which suddenly had changed after talking the big news out.

The sun was out properly now and it was time to head home. They had stretched their moment alone a little too long. Two hours of sleep would be the most they would get this night and that would hardly be enough to live up to the extravaganza, which was ahead of them.

* * *

Lorelai entered the bedroom quietly, she didn't want to wake her husband. She smiled at the thought. Her husband. And the same time she frowned. Her husband stayed their first night as a married couple alone in bed. There was no consummation of their marriage. Her husband had spent their first night alone in bed with the dog.

Lorelai had told Luke not to wait up for her, when she asked him to leave her alone for a quiet mother-daughter-moment. It was the end of an era. There were no longer just mother and daughter, someone new, who had entered their lives almost two decades ago, took a very important place in their lives now. Lorelai understood now, even after the news Rory had dropped over her head, that marrying Luke could only happen when she could let go off her tight bond with Rory.

Her daughter was grown now; she had her own head and made her own decisions for her life, despite what her mother thought of it. The book proofed that. She wrote it regardless of Lorelai's feelings. And after those words spoken in the Gazebo, Lorelai knew they were no longer the inseparable Gilmore Girls, Rory was so eager to write about.

Or maybe now was the right moment to write about it when it was the end of that period of their life and the beginning of a new era for both of the Gilmore Girls. Rory would have to learn to adapt to being a single mother, while Lorelai had to learn to be a wife and a grandmother at the same time.

After Lorelai had removed her make-up, she took off the dress she'd always consider her real wedding-dress, and not the others she would wear later that day. She snuggled under the covers and was careful not to move too much. She was set on giving Luke the peaceful sleep he deserved after all the stress she had put him though in the last weeks. He had been convinced he had lost Lorelai when she went for her Wild-trip, and, in the end, he won her, for real this time, permanently, forever, as his wife. She belonged to him, just as much as he belonged to her.

Lorelai took a deep breath and looked at her left hand, on which the wedding ring was sitting on her finger. It was a pity she had to remove the ring once more before the ceremony. She wanted it to stick there forever. It felt nice to have the extra weight on the finger; it felt natural, just like it had been there for years.

Eventually, she decided to take her eyes away from the ring and let them drift to her husband, the man she called her partner in life. She rolled onto her side to gain a better perspective. It calmed her down how steadily he took breath after breath as he slept. Watching her husband made her forget what news she had just heard half an hour ago.

Watching him made her realise that she could survive anything as long as he was next to her. The ring on both of their hands made sure that this was going to happen. There were no insecurities anymore. It was clear and out there that they belonged together, committing to each other, no more doubts coming from her mother, no more fear that the other could easily leave the other. It would take a stack of paperwork now if one wanted to leave the other, which would ensure the other enough time to make the one filing for the divorce understand why they still belonged together. There was no more running. No more what-ifs. No more.

It was just them. A fully committed, married couple, living together, sharing their lives with each other, giving the other the love and support they needed.

Lorelai sighed. It was such a long and rocky road getting here and yet there were not destined to start their married life happily, without a single problem ahead of them, instead they were heading into rough weather.

She silently debated whether she should tell Luke Rory's news, whether she could grant him one day without worries, without the knowledge of the storm ahead of them, whether it was even her news to tell, whether she could start into this marriage with keeping secrets from her husband.

And in the end, Luke took that decision from her, when he opened his eyes. His lips instantly switched into a smile when he saw Lorelai lying across from him. When Lorelai didn't return his smile, he lost his too. Lorelai felt Luke reaching out for her cheek, caressing her jaw. He asked, "What's up? You don't regret this, do you?"

Lorelai caught his hand at her jaw, squeezing it tightly; she made sure her wedding ring was pressing hard against his hand. She wanted him to know there was no way in this world she would ever regret marrying him. It was the right choice. She shook her head, placing a light kiss against his palm.

Luke then reached out to place a kiss on her forehead, which made Lorelai close her eyes and relax some more into his touch. She felt safe with him. She always did and that's when she decided that the no-secrets-rule had to be kept alive in this marriage. No more keeping things from her husband, the man she called her safe harbour. "Luke, I'm afraid the tough times of our marriage start right now."

At first, Luke thought this was the introduction to a joke, but Lorelai's voice sounded too serious, not a hint of cheerfulness in it. He didn't answer her, but gathered her properly into his arms. Her head was buried in the crook of his neck, while he buried his into her hair; the smell of her shampoo filled his nose. He loved that she smelt like a fruit-salad, even though she hated eating fruit in real life. Putting fruit on your hair and skin was not the same as putting them into your body.

Lorelai didn't put the tough times they were forced to face into words instantly. She took her time, being close to her husband in their bed, on their wedding day, after their elopement, before the wedding ceremony, which all the people who cared for them were here to witness. They only had little moments left to be all alone today. A long line of big moment after big moment was ahead of them, filled with people, who wanted to give their love to them, but all that really mattered was the love they shared for each other.

Eventually, Lorelai dared to look up again, to meet the eyes, which were patiently waiting for an answer. She caressed his cheek just like he had done minutes before to her. The stubble was showing already and she would remind him to shave later, even though she had grown to like the rough look on him. With one last deep breath, Lorelai finally talked about the events in the Gazebo after Luke and the others had left for their respective beds.

Lorelai watched carefully as Luke's face sprang from surprise, to disappointment, to confusion, to a glimpse of joy, to a state of astonishment. It expressed an obvious loss of words. Eventually, he admitted, "It's a lot to take in."

Lorelai nodded. "I know. I don't know how I feel about it either. I mean, being a Grandmother. I'm not old enough for that."

"Your daughter is 32. It's an absolute normal age to have children." Luke pointed out and Lorelai had to admit he was right. 32 was double the age she was when she was pregnant with Rory. It was not a scandal to have a child at 32, a normal age to have a child. The best age to have a child maybe, not too old, not too young. But it wasn't the age that bothered Lorelai, it were the circumstances that Rory was heading into single-motherhood.

Luke agreed with her. The circumstances were awful when they were honest to themselves. Rory had no job, and no place to live. The absence of a father was not ideal either, but Lorelai would never point out that a child needed a father and a mother. She didn't want to become her own mother.

Despite Rory getting pregnant at an unplanned time, this didn't mean Rory would follow her mother's steps in every single way. This seemed like history repeated itself, but Lorelai was set to fight against every mistake her parents did to her when she was pregnant with Rory. The story would not become full circle.

Lorelai and Luke talked about ways to support Rory and get her back on the right way. They decided to make her stay with them, even expanding the house a little to make room for Rory and the baby. She'd need time to get on her own feet again and a baby needed certainly a lot of things, which cost money, which Rory without a steady job couldn't provide.

Moreover, Rory was set on writing the book, still with everything happening, she would need a place and time to write too. Within close reach, Lorelai and Luke would be able to help her out any time she wanted. Living in Queens like she intended to do just a couple of days ago, was not the right option when Rory wanted to rely on her family's help, even more with Emily living on Nantucket now.

Neither Lorelai nor Luke wanted their first grandchild growing up far away where they could only occasionally pop over. They wanted to be involved and spoil the child rotten. They smiled at the thought of finally getting their fresh kid together.

The more they talked about it, the more plans they made, the better Lorelai felt about the situation. She felt the smiles creeping more and more often over her lips. She laughed over little jokes Luke and she shared or a thought she liked. She got comfortable with the situation. It didn't overwhelm her anymore, talking about it helped and Luke was such a good listener.

They were ready to face the tough times of their marriage, but first off they were ready to face the wedding ceremony all of Stars Hollow had waited to happen far too long.

"We're some pair, aren't we?" Luke said as he reached for Lorelai's upper arm to pat it playfully. "Getting married and having a grandchild on the same day. We don't do things the ordinary way."

"Well, the kid's not born yet, so I say, we can still be considered within the norm." Lorelai countered back. She rose an eyebrow, she liked being right. They locked eyes, little smiles on their faces, they watched the other with adoration.

"Within the norm or not, I wouldn't want it any other way", Luke said with a great amount of affection towards her. He looked at her intensely. Lorelai was caught off guard by his words, she let them sink in. She thought about them and came to a different outcome than her husband. Her eyes filled with tears again, she bit down on her bottom lip to remain calm.

Luke sighed. "Don't dwell on the past or think about what-ifs. They don't get you anywhere."

"It's just- we could have had this a decade ago." Lorelai shrugged; she knew what-ifs wouldn't get her anyway, but if she wasn't able to be nostalgic on her wedding day when could she?

"We weren't apart for this time. We didn't lose any time, Lorelai." Luke cradled her head towards his chest. He went with his fingers through hair, untangling any knots that might be in there.

"We were apart for a bit, if you remember." Lorelai retorted softly, mumbling against his chest.

Luke closed his eyes, fighting hard to not re-live this period of his life. "I try not to."

"It should have been years ago", Lorelai said again, but not as full with regret anymore. It sounded more like a statement, a realisation.

"We are here now. And that's what really matters", Luke said.

After a moment of silence, Lorelai chuckled. She pressed herself away form Luke. "You know, what's really funny is that we waited all this time to get married, but as soon as we decided again we couldn't wait to be married. We waited all these years, but we couldn't wait another day."

"Seems about right." Luke returned her smile.

Over Lorelai's face flashed another wave of realisation, which she voiced, "We probably shouldn't tell my Mom about this secret ceremony, she'd freak out that she missed the real one. And not a word to Sookie either. I'm serious, she'll kill me if she ever finds out she was not at my real wedding. She's our biggest fan."

Luke nodded and added another person who should never know about the secret ceremony. "I missed April there."

"I know, babe." Lorelai patted his shoulder as she sighed. Their family was not complete at the wedding. "She'll be here today. Those highly intelligent people at MIT keep her on her toes and she couldn't afford to miss an extra day."

"I know, I know, as long as she's happy." He went through his hair in frustration. "But driving in and out from Boston, all on her own, on one day; that still makes me nervous."

"She'll be OK; she had you to teach her how to drive. She won't be rushing." She looked over his shoulder to get a glimpse of the alarm clock on his nightstand. "And she's getting ready to hit the road soon."

"You should catch some sleep", Luke said eventually. Lorelai nodded and started to settle properly under the covers. She moved closer to him, taking in his smell, which made her relax even more. Luke asked, "You're fine with what we discussed?"

"More than fine, husband of mine."

Luke smiled and leaned over to kiss her good-night. It was nothing but a quick peck on the lips. Nothing a newly wedded couple would normally share, but exhaustion hit them finally. They wanted to go to sleep as quickly as possible. It would only be a short nap. Lorelai mumbled, "I'll need lots and lots of coffee today."

"As long as you don't spill it on your dress, I'm happy to provide some", Luke said as he yawned, sneaking an arm around Lorelai's waist to gather her closer.

Lorelai patted his chest. She closed her eyes and was already half-way to dream-land. "Ah, I just change it to another one if that happens."

* * *

Luke thought she was joking, but was surprised to see Lorelai sneak off during the wedding to change dresses just like she had said in the morning. One dress was more beautiful than the other, Luke wouldn't be able to choose his favourite and he was not the only one. Lorelai couldn't decide on one dress to marry and celebrate her marriage to Luke either. Every dress strung another chord and that was why she had to wear them all on her wedding day.

The second the wedding party hit another quiet time and Lorelai didn't change into yet another dress, she took Rory and Luke aside. Luke and Lorelai explained to Rory the plans they had come up in the morning. They defined what kind of support Luke and she were able to offer Rory. They wouldn't let her down. They were set to do whatever it took to overcome this tough time. In the end, the outcome, a healthy grandchild, was worth dealing with the mess right now.

"We'll be there for you. Every single step of the way, Rory", Lorelai assured her. She was glad that Luke placed a hand on the small of her back, giving her the support she needed. He had her back on this.

Rory took the support without a thought of doubt, without hesitation. Her shoulders relaxed the second she realised her mother and Luke would never leave her in the lurch.

Luke found the words, which the always talking Gilmore Girls were not able to find, "then we have to make room for another family-member!"

Lorelai watched as Luke drew Rory into a hug. Rory was indeed a little bit his, and Lorelai was glad that they could officially call each other father and daughter now, well step-father and stepdaughter, but she was sure they would drop the first syllable quite soon.

It was a big moment, a moment in which the family grew closer together, in which the patchwork family became finally a real family. However, the family Lorelai had gathered so carefully was not complete. They missed a family-member, who should definitely be included into this moment. The person had already missed so much with the elopement last night.

Lorelai didn't want the person to miss out on another family-moment. She turned her head and let her eyes wander over the wedding party. She looked for the same colour of dress Rory was wearing. She looked for the dark curly hair, which was so similar to hers. Eventually, she found April sitting on a table, being engaged in some Stars Hollow gossip with Babette and Miss Patty. Lorelai caught April's gaze and smiled at her. April returned the smile and Lorelai motioned with her head to join them. However, April was not good at catching hints. So, Lorelai raised her hand to signal with a wave for April to come over, which she eventually did.

As Rory drew her mother close and they exchanged word of thanks and love, April joined the group. Lorelai withdrew herself form Rory's hug and took another deep breath. This was the beginning of something new, a new era. It had to be done the right way. She took the lead like she had grown to do. "Tell her" Her demand was directed to Rory.

"What? Now?" Rory was surprised by her mother's action. Her eyes widened, she expressed her concern, "Shouldn't I tell Grandma first?"

"You want to face the thunderstorm Emily _now_?" Lorelai retorted.

"No, not really." Rory mumbled, taking the words in. She hadn't thought of telling people yet. She was mulling it over, but Lorelai pushed her by saying, "so, tell her."

"Guys, what's going on? Is this another joke I don't get?" April was confused by the social actions she was witnessing.

Luke patted her shoulders and said, "Don't worry, sweetie."

"April, today is not only the day you got another mother and a sister, but…" Lorelai introduced the big news and looked expectantly at Rory.

She had no other option than to follow her mother's lead, even if she may feel differently about telling people. She had no time to digest the plans she had made with her mother and Luke. She had to go through with this and told April the news, "You'll be an aunt."

* * *

 _That's it for now. I hope you enjoyed it. Please let me know._

 _I know you're all here for the drama I announced in the summary, and I promise you we'll get to it in the next chapter. For now, enjoy the happy times - because for now, they ARE the picture perfect family and I couldn't be happier. Gilmore-Danes-Nardini forever!_

 _And one more note, I'll update this story always on Friday, so see you soon. xxx_


	2. Chapter 2

_First off, thank you to everyone who enjoyed this story and left me a review and/or clicked on "fave/follow". I'm glad the story was liked so far. I hope it stays like this because we're heading into the drama. Enjoy the ride; it has some very fluffy scenes in the beginning too._

 _Side-note: If you're carving fluff-only, I also recommend reading my post-revival one-shot "Her Story, Her Daughter, Her Husband", which blends perfectly fine between the first and the second Chapter. What a coincidence! *self-promotion over* Let's get it on with the drama!_

* * *

 **Second Chapter: How It Should Have Been**

Everything fell into place after the wedding. Finally. It felt like it should have been like this all these years ago. Lorelai and Luke worked hard to let the other in their life as much as possible. No more sayings like, "this is mine, keep out of it." His was hers and hers was his; it was theirs.

Luke was a big help dealing with Rory's crisis, but helping with Rory was never Luke's issue. It was about Lorelai letting him in. She always drew the line at some point, but this time she didn't; she let him in and let him be part of the situation. She involved him the decision-making; she allowed him to be involved as much as he wanted, and he wanted to be involved in every single way.

Sometimes Luke would give too much; Rory and Lorelai had to fight hard to keep him out of the delivery room. He wanted to be there when his first grandchild was born. But in the end, Lorelai promised him he'd be the first to see the baby. He was indeed the first to hold the baby, after Rory and Lorelai of course, but once the baby was settled into his arms, he refused to let go.

To Lorelai and Rory's surprise, Luke was a natural with a baby, but he reminded them that he grew comfortable with babies when Stars Hollow hit the great baby-boom of 2007. First, he had been introduced to his niece Doula, and later to Lane's twins, who he was a godfather to. Lorelai had then eventually forced him to hold Sookie's third child over and over again.

Babies seemed to like Luke. They relaxed in his arms, and no on knew why. Rory's little baby was no exception. Whenever the kid was not feeling well, Luke was the one who could do the calming-down the best. It was a running-joke the family grew to love over time. Luke was nothing but a big softy to them, a teddy bear, which the youngest family-member hold on to tightly whenever Luke was within reach.

Luke was happy to be a grandfather; he spent every free minute to create all these great grandfather-memories, which his daughter could not built with his father, William. Therefore, he had to cut time at some other places. Spending time alone with April, apart from his grandchild and wife, was not working anymore. Luke finally let Lorelai into April's life completely. No more separate lives.

The no-separation-rule also applied to their finances; Luke and Lorelai had to work hard to make it work. With Rory and the baby, April going to grad-school, the annex for the Dragonfly Inn and tackling daily life, money had to be a strict business now. The wedding had cost a little fortune as well; and, in general, it was better to plan ahead. They weren't on a strict budget, but out-of-the-blue shopping-sprees wouldn't take place every so often.

However, Lorelai persuaded Luke shopping-sprees had to happen every once in a while. April appreciated Lorelai's effort, and Luke was happy he was liberated from his duty to be a shopping assistant. He liked seeing his daughter and his wife bond; he finally granted them the alone-time he had denied them all these years along. Luke didn't know why he didn't allow them that earlier. April didn't turn against him or liked Lorelai better than him. Nothing bad happened, quite the opposite, he was happy to notice that April's vocabulary improved whenever she hung out with Lorelai. Luke was pleased to see that he no longer needed to look up every other word she spoke, but only every third to forth word. Communication with her improved a lot.

After all this time, they were finally becoming the family Luke and Lorelai had always dreamed of, when they were lying in bed together after their first engagement and decided kids would be good. They had three wonderful kids, not one all theirs, they came from all over the place, but neither Luke nor Lorelai wanted to change a thing about that fact. With Paul-Anka, they made the picture-perfect family.

That was proven to Lorelai again, when she was sitting in bed, waiting for Luke to join her. She heard him walking up the stairs and soon, he entered the bedroom with their grandchild in his arms. He settled into bed next to her, the kid pressing against his chest; he smoothed over the child's back. Lorelai couldn't help but stare at the duo next to her. It filled her heart with more love than she could handle inside her; she could not hold back the adoration she felt for these two people next to her. She had to let her feelings out and the best way to do that was to let her actions speak. She rolled onto her side, ready to join the cuddling the other two were so good at.

"Rory was asleep, so I thought I'll bring the little One upstairs, instead of waking her. She seems exhausted", Luke said when he noticed Lorelai staring at him like the 8th wonder of the world. He caught her looking at him like that more often lately. He saw nothing but love in her eyes. And that was what he liked about their marriage: They didn't need to tell the other how much they cared and loved each other; just one look was enough and the other knew.

"I'm not complaining. You know I love it when there's three of us in the bed." Paul-Anka stirred on the end of the bed, so she added quickly with a laughter, not too loud, so she wouldn't wake the dog or the kid falling asleep on Luke's chest, "Or four of us."

Luke chuckled as well, as he petted over the kid's head, lifting his head up, so he could place a kiss on the kid's forehead. "I'm afraid our grandchild won't ever be able to spend the night alone in a bed."

"There's worse in the world." Lorelai stated. They had been through worse. A grandchild staying every night in their bed, was a small hassle. But she figured Luke needed to rant and keep his grumpiness alive somehow. It defined him.

Luke saw Lorelai's smile across her face, which he loved; he had fallen for this smile all these years ago when they had first met in the diner. He couldn't help himself but smile back at her. He wouldn't let her have the last words as easily though and retorted, "I'll remind you in 15 years when there's still four of us in the bed."

"Did you hear that Paul-Anka? You'll gonna break the record for being the oldest Polish Lowland Sheepdog on this entire world. There ain't a dog that is older than you, buddy." Lorelai joked as she pushed the dog a little with her feet. Paul-Anka lifted his head for moment, to find Lorelai and Luke staring at him. When there was no sign of a treat or a caress other by a foot, he dropped his head again and went back to sleep.

"That dog's gonna outlive us all." Luke pointed out, making it sound like it was the worst nightmare to be outlived by the beloved pet.

"He's been with us through it all this crap, that's only fair", Lorelai said as she carefully placed her head on Luke's shoulder. That way she had a better angle to look at the baby sleeping on Luke's chest. And the body-contact with her husband was another advantage she wouldn't give up on. All the pillows in the bed weren't as comfortable as Luke's shoulder.

"There's still some of the new baby scent left, isn't it?" Lorelai asked as she dropped a kiss to the kid's head. The dark blond curls were soft against her lips. Soon it would be time for the first haircut. Lorelai would do whatever it took to postpone the visit to the hairdresser as long as she possibly could. Nothing could compare to the hair of a baby.

"Hardly. This one just smells like the rest of the world now." Luke took in some of the baby's smell and placed another kiss on the child's head. He grew to enjoy showing affection towards his grandchild as often as he could. Lorelai kept reminding him that he should as long as he was able to. This was the time to give all the love they wanted to as the child was still too young to fight against it.

"This time goes by too quickly." Lorelai sighed, as she went through the child's hair, softly drawing circles with the tips of her fingers.

Luke sighed. It was true, time had passed by quickly. Day after day, week after week, month after month. The kid grew fast and time seemed to keep slipping through their fingers. He side-glanced at Lorelai, smirking. "Yeah, but we've got it all well documented, haven't we?"

"All on my phone." She nodded and sat up to reach for the smart-phone on her bed stand. "By the way, let's take a picture of you."

"Another one?" Luke groaned because he knew Lorelai could easily loose herself in her obsession of documenting every step of their grandchild's growth. Not once were they late for appointments or town-meetings because Lorelai was still taking pictures of the kid.

"In 20 years time, when this little bundle of joy will give us a hard time, you'll be happy to have them and remember these innocent times in bed." Lorelai stated as she opened the camera on her phone, turning it to horizontal format.

Luke couldn't oppose anything to that, so he posed for the camera as Lorelai took a photo or two. After that, she rested her head again on his shoulder to show him the pictures and then, she decided it was time to take a selfie, which Luke was happy to be part in. He had gotten used to taking selfies over the many years Lorelai had gotten addicted to her phone and the front camera it had to offer. Luke learned how to pose, and when to make an odd face. He became a pro at taking selfies, much to Lorelai's delight.

Lorelai placed the phone back on the bedside table and rolled on her side, ready to fall asleep. She nudged Luke in the side and said, "Hey, it's time for the little One to move to the middle of the bed. It's not fair, you have our favourite grandchild all to yourself."

Luke grumbled when he had to remove his personal hot-water bottle. It was his least favourite part of their nightly routine. Lorelai immediately snuggled closer, draping an arm softly over the child's body. It was a moment like this, in which Lorelai felt content and complete, even though the family wasn't at this moment.

* * *

It was Labour Day when the family was finally complete again. April came by to check in with the family. She was not good with babies and refused to lice up to be an aunt to the kid, who had turned one this summer. Still, April had sneaked out to hold the kid once since then kid came to the world. At first, no one noticed, but after scrolling through the many pictures Lorelai had taken with her phone, she noticed there was no picture of April holding the kid. Lorelai was set to get one of her with the kid today. April wouldn't be able to visit until Thanksgiving. The baby would have grown to a proper toddler by then. The phase of being cute and being helpless was going to end soon because the kid had learned to walk this month. The photo of Lorelai's dreams had to happen today or it would be a missed opportunity forever.

However, April was not as open to the idea as Lorelai thought she would. April crossed her arms in front of her chest, when Lorelai approached her with the suggestion. She was not a fan of it at all. She had never held a child before and tried getting her out of this. With a grossed out face, April asked, "Is it safe for me to hold it? Like it's not contagious or something?"

Lorelai, Luke, and Rory laughed about the worries April had. They exchanged looks of amusement, and Lorelai said, as she rolled her eyes, "No. Besides, I was at the doctors the other week and he said everything's fine with our little One. So go ahead, and take your-"

April held her hand up to stop Lorelai from talking and handing over the child. "Don't say the n-word, please, I beg you!"

"The n-word?" Lorelai frowned for a moment, until she realised what April meant with saying that. "It's not a curse-word."

"I'm way too young to be an aunt", April said, and folded her arms once again in front of her chest. She sat down on the couch in the living room and reached for her phone again. But that wouldn't stop her from keeping a conversation rolling. She was capable of multitasking and it stunned Luke every time she joined a conversation out of the blue, fully aware of what had been discussed so far. It caught Luke off guard and he couldn't imagine concentrating on two things at once, reading and listening to a conversation.

"You're the only real aunt this kid will ever have, so step up to this job." Lorelai asked April. She wanted her grandchild to have the perfect family, which also included an engaging aunt.

April looked up from her phone, and responded, "I will. Eventually. When it-"

"Stop calling my kid an 'it'!" Rory had watched the scene unfold in front of her, but she had to step in now. She felt the need to protect her child. She took her kid from Lorelai and propped the kid against her hip. The kid, however, was not pleased with the change of location, still reaching the arms in Lorelai's direction.

"I will be an aunt to it-"

"April!" Rory and Lorelai said in unison, watching the 25-year-old leaning back to the couch in frustration.

"I'll be an aunt to-", April started again, but Rory caught her off, before she could reach the crucial part of the sentence.

"Don't say 'it' again." Rory warned her, shifting the toddler from on side of her hip to the other, but the kid's mood wouldn't improve. She frowned at the kid and her stepsister.

April rolled her eyes, which everybody could see. She no longer wore her hair down and couldn't hide behind it anymore. She had ditched the colourful head a while ago, and instead wore her hair up in a high messy bun. The operative word was messy. Handling the wild hair she refused to comb on a regular basis was tricky and April never put much effort into her appearance. Strands of hair were framing her face. She clicked her tongue in disapproval first and chose her words more carefully. "-to this human-being who yet has to develop a personality and the ability to take care for basic human needs without help from others."

The others in the room were silent. No one had expected her to say something like this. However, in the end, it was something only April would come up with. Lorelai locked eyes with Rory. She mumbled, "I don't know if that's better."

"Take it or leave it!" April ordered quickly, cutting time short for the Gilmore Girls got react to it with a sassy come-back.

"Sold." Rory gave in and bouncing the toddle up and down in her arms, which seemed to do the job of lighting the mood.

April was satisfied, and was sure to sneak out of holding the baby everyone was so eager to put in her arms. "I'll be an aunt to his human-being when I can actually do something cool. Like reading a book."

Rory knew how to persuade April. She smiled, as she talked, "You can read a book now and you know how important early intervention is to the human brain. The synapses develop right now. Whatever a kid sees now, affects how a person will see and understand the world later on. This is your chance to experience environmental influences on the human brain."

"Really? You're taking biology and take it against me to force me to hold this spitting thing?" April's mouth dropped open because she was defeated by her own interests. Biology had turned against her. She felt betrayed.

"Stop calling my kid a thing!" Rory shook her head in disbelief. She neared April on the couch, ready to hand her child over, whispering, "Really, you did not do well in the aunt-department, kiddo."

"Just get it over with. Hand the baby over." April eventually said, stretching her arms out. She looked into the child's blue eyes and smiled as the child reached for her glasses. April stopped the little hands from grabbing them and caught the hand in her fist, giving it a squeeze.

Lorelai squealed at the sight in front of her. She finally got was she wanted. "Wait! I have to get my phone. I need pictures, all the pictures in the world. This needs to be documented. April holds a baby, my grandchild. Finally, are aunt and-"

April averted her eyes from the toddler and shot her stepmother a grim look. She warned her, "Don't say the n-word."

Lorelai, however, didn't acknowledge the warning, she was too happy with the sight in front of her. She hopped to the little table in the foyer to fetch her phone. She gushed, "This will so be the best Christmas-card in the history of all Christmas-cards. Luke, hon, get in there with them." She motioned with her arm in his direction.

"Are you sure? Maybe I should take the photo-", Luke began, but Lorelai cut him off, and was already taking position to take photos, "No, please, I want the most precious photo of the four people in the world, who mean the most to me. Ah, April, the baby really suits you."

Luke lifted his finger to April and to Rory, grumbling, "Don't get any funny ideas. I love the little One, but that's it for now. Do you hear me? The both of you?"

Rory frowned, as she placed a hand on her kid's back, to support April with making sure the toddler would look into the camera. "That's a little late, Luke."

"I'm talking about a brother or sister. We don't need another one", Luke said and sat down on April's other side. He gave her a shove, to get her attention, "I didn't hear you replying, April."

April looked lost, as she was about to lose the battle of keeping her glasses on her nose. She sighed, sounding annoyed. "No child for me in the next decade."

Luke was relieved. He enjoyed his time with his grandchild, but he couldn't imagine having another one around yet. He was still busy with the Diner and it would be too much for him. As soon was he was retired, he would be open to have a crazy bunch of grandkids occupying the house and his life. But for now, the one grandchild he had was more than enough.

He was pulled out of his thoughts, when April shrieked, "Can we get this over with, please? Fast!"

Lorelai flicked her finger in Paul-Anka's direction, who was lying on an armchair. "Buddy, go to daddy. Come on!" Luke protested at first because he didn't like being called the dog's father, but he lifted the dog to his lap anyway.

Lorelai took photos, which would look great on the Christmas cards. Finally, she was in the position to make everyone jealous of the family she had. They were picture perfect when they looked into the camera with their bright smiles across their faces. She wouldn't want to change a thing. She wanted this moment to last. She wanted the world to stand still. This was what she had been waiting for her whole life. The happiness and joy, which her family brought to her life. She was finally there, at the happy place down the road. She looked pleased on the screen of her phone, taking the happy faces in.

* * *

What the happy faces didn't know yet, was that Rory felt overwhelmed with all of these happy family moments. She didn't feel like she was in control of her life anymore. She watched it happen, went along with everything her mother, and Luke, decided to be right for her and her child.

She lived under their roof. The house she grew up in was no longer her home where she had an equal voice in deciding things. Lorelai and Luke outnumbered her, they worked as a team, which Rory was happy to see, but often they went against her will and treated her like a child. It was never her intention, but doing things unconsciously was even worse than doing it intentionally. Lorelai would dismissively say things like, "I've had a child before, I know what should be done. Trust me."

Rory did trust her Mom. She had raised Rory well enough, but Rory wanted control back. She wanted to be the one calling the shots, but ever since she told her mother and Luke she would keep the baby, every single bit of control went out of her hands and right into Luke and Lorelai's hands.

She didn't want to tell anybody else about the pregnancy; it had still been early, but Lorelai had decided April needed to know, right there at the wedding reception, when everything had been so fresh and still undecided. Her mother had decided when it was right to tell people, what do next, where to be, what things to buy, and where to put them.

Lorelai had done it before, and Rory had no clue. Lorelai put her on bed-rest, told her to write the book, told her to keep Logan, the father of the child, up to date. And it was fine in the beginning because Rory had no direction and the world kept spinning around her. Her Mom gave her directions and she was happy to follow wherever she led. She relied on her because babies and their breeding were not her special field. She had to rely on and trust Lorelai.

She trusted Lorelai, of course, there was not question about that; Lorelai was her Mom, who had guided her perfectly fine for the last 34 years. But that was the point, her mother made her feel like a child and not a self-determined adult.

Rory was asked about her opinions, but she was not the one calling the tune. Lorelai made the final decisions and Rory was sure whenever she would stand up to her, she would fail to persuade her. Only profound actions, like dropping out of Yale, would make her mother stop having things firmly in her hands. The situation asked for an extreme action, which meant to cut her mother off from the leading position, to get herself some space to be herself, and to make decisions on her own, and for her own kid.

It was time. The time to break free was here; she had to break the circle she had gotten herself into. It was almost two years ago she had told her mother she was pregnant. She had been long enough in that circle.

However, Rory didn't notice that by breaking that one particular circle she was so fed up with being in, she fulfilled another circle and made the lives of the Gilmores full circle. History repeated itself, when Rory left nothing but a letter for her mother. She left town and was set on not returning any time soon. She had to get some distance between her ever-controlling mother, who never gave up the lead when it came down to wanting the best for her child and grandchild.

But right now, Rory knew what was best for her and that was not being here anymore. She glanced back once more, not thinking of what this might do her mother emotionally, and if it would hurt her. Rory concentrated on how much better she would feel herself.

She would be finally living on her on, at the age of 34. She would make a life without anyone else possible. Just she and the kid she grew to love so much, but never had the chance to enjoy by herself. Her mother and Luke were always there, taking her kid away from her, to take care of their grandchild. She couldn't even remember the last time she had changed diapers. Luke would offer his help whenever he could. Changing dirty diapers didn't gross him out as much as the others. But Rory missed the dirty work. From now on, it would only be her, who would change diapers and the thought couldn't make her happier.

The pressure, which had built over the last two years, was gone as soon as she left Stars Hollow behind. She left in the car her mother and Luke had paid for. With the baby seat her grandmother had bought for her. Her kid wearing something Sookie had given to her.

She didn't like the car, it was nothing she would have chosen herself, but the car brought her from point A to point B and that was its purpose.

She didn't like the baby seat; she wanted to get another one, which would grow with the kid. She considered it ridiculous to buy an extra seat as her child was getting taller, but the seat served its purpose.

She didn't like what her kid was wearing; she never wanted her child to wear the colours a gender-stereotypical world asked to. Not blues. No pinks. No stereotypical colours. But Lorelai every so often reminded her that she needed a lot of clothes in that period of a kid's life. They grew out of everything so fast that you couldn't be picky what they were wearing and most people were still not as cautious when it came to gender-neutral clothing and bought what they were used for a certain gender. Blue for boys. Pink for girls. The clothes served their purpose.

But Rory couldn't stand it anymore. Having things she didn't want, but keeping them because they served their purpose. She would sell the car, and buy another one. She would get rid of the baby seat. That onesie her kid was wearing at the moment would get thrown away as soon as she arrived.

Rory didn't know where she was heading to yet, but one was for certain, she was going away. Away from her mother, away from the life she did not set up for herself. The life she just followed along. Ahead of her was a life in which she finally became an independent, and happy woman.

* * *

Lorelai and Luke did not know yet about Rory's decision. They were about to leave to see a movie in the Black-White-Read-theatre. Lorelai couldn't remember whether Kirk would show his third film or if the screening would take place next week. She called out to Rory because she wanted to let her know they were leaving. However, there was no response coming from her room. Luke called out again, as he helped Lorelai into her jacket, smoothing over her arms. She patted his shoulder, before she went down the hallway to tell Rory in person.

She did not see the warning signals of Rory's departure. Lorelai didn't notice that the stroller was no longer in the foyer. She didn't register that the floor was no longer covered with little toy cars here and dolls there. She did not register that the high-chair did not longer sit on the high end of the table. She didn't notice, and she didn't sense anything odd or weird.

It took her by surprise, when she did notice that Rory's room was empty. She stopped in her step at the door-frame to the room. The room was empty, the furniture was still there, but all of Rory's personal stuff was gone. The crib was gone. The shelves empty, only single books remaining, which Lorelai was sure Rory had copies to. The desk was no longer full of papers and pens. No notes were spread on it.

All was gone because Rory was gone. Lorelai took her time taking it in. Taking in what this meant. There was no explanation. No warning signals that this might happen. Rory was gone. Her grandchild was gone. Their stuff was gone. They weren't here anymore.

She reached out for the door-frame to steady herself because her knees were about to give in. She shook her head, but the fact that her daughter and grandchild were not longer hear didn't change. Shaking her head didn't change the fact that her daughter had taken off.

Luke came to see what was taking her so long. He asked what was going on, but Lorelai didn't answer him. She couldn't. When Rory left, she had taken all of Lorelai's words with her. Lorelai finally stepped into the room to gather a piece of paper from Rory's bedside table, which had caught her eye. In a neat handwriting, a few lines of explanation were written down, starting with a "Dear Mom and Luke".

Lorelai drew in a sharp breath, and holding it afterwards. She turned to Luke, as she read through the lines, her eyes swelling up with tears. She let herself fall down on the bed, the paper dropping on the bed next to her. In disbelief, she went with her hand through her hair, finally exhaling, staring at the wall in front of her. The world seemed upside down, not correct anymore. Her daughter had left her; Rory was supposed to be here. Her room was empty, but it was supposed to be full of stuff and life. Nothing was left here, but a broken heart inside Lorelai.

Luke picked up the paper and read the lines himself, which had shaken up Lorelai so badly. He had to sit down as well. He never imagined something like this would ever happen to him or Lorelai. He was short of words; the very few written on the paper had taken them all away from him. All he could do was let his actions speak, and right now his wife needed someone to be there for her. He put his arm around her shoulders, drawing her closer to him, patting her upper arm, up and down, smoothing over it, giving her some physical comfort.

They couldn't remember how long they sat there; in each other arms, being left by their daughter and grandchild. Suddenly, Lorelai sprang up and ran to the foyer to get her phone. She wouldn't let her daughter get away with this, without any kind of fight. She dialled Rory's number, there was the ringing tone, but Rory didn't answer the call. Lorelai reached the voice mail, but she didn't leave a message. She ended to call just to re-dial. She wanted to speak to her in person.

Again she tried calling Rory, but she didn't pick up this time either. Lorelai left a message, asking her to call her back. Her voice sounded neutral, no hint of emotion in it. She was surprised she could pull herself together this well. Inside, she was torn between hurt and anger, but overall the confusion hovered over her like a dark cloud.

She tried calling Rory the third time now, and when she reached nothing but the voice mail, the emotion finally broke free. She was staring at her phone, the hands started to tremble, and the eyes were filling up with tears. She sensed Luke standing beside her and she looked up into to his eyes, which were reflecting the same hurt she felt. With a weak voice, hardly above a whisper, Lorelai said, "She won't pick up."

Luke didn't waste time, took the phone out of her hand, placed in on the table near by and gathered her into his arms. They hadn't shared a proper hug since they had found out Rory had left them. As soon as Lorelai was pressed against Luke, she let go. No more need to be strong, to be composed, or OK with the situation because the situation was horrible. She didn't need to be OK with situation; she didn't need to be composed; she didn't need to be strong, because she and strong arms which would catch her.

Luke cradled her neck, bringing her head further in the crook of his neck. He pulled her closer, never wanting to let go off her. He placed kiss after kiss on her head, letting her cry as long as she wanted, as long as she needed.

She, eventually, withdrew herself from the embrace, just to give Rory another call. Luke stayed close, and wiped the tears off her cheeks. Her eyes giving her thanks to him, not once leaving his gaze as she waited for Rory to answer the call, but Rory didn't pick up.

She tried calling her over and over again, and every single time Rory didn't pick up. She tried calling her so often, and left messages ever so often. Some were angry, some were desperate, some were devastated, some were sad and teary and consisted more of sobs than words. Sometimes she hung up immediately after reaching the voice mail. She texted her. She sent massages on every single social media platform she was part of. She sent e-mails. She did everything she could to reach out to her kid, but all she had in the end was no answer and a letter telling her that Rory left and wouldn't come back.

Eventually, when Lorelai was all worn out of the attempts to get in touch with Rory, she lay in bed, sobbing, crying, and not understanding the world. The hurt consumed her. She was not capable of doing anything else but feeling the pain of being abandoned by her own child. She had driven away her own child and that hurt.

Luke was there all the time, whispering words of comfort, being close to her, handing her tissue after tissue, petting her head. He did everything to make her feel better, even though he knew that nothing could make her feel better. The longer she mourned, the more time he had to worry. Not just about Lorelai, but about Rory too. He wondered what happened that she decided to leave like this. She must have been desperate if she thought there was not other way than taking off without a warning.

While stroking Lorelai's hair, he fished the flip-phone out from his front pocket of his flannel shirt. He flipped it open and dialled Rory's number. He didn't expect her to pick up; he was prepared to leave a message on her voice mail. The beep signalled him to start speaking, but he was still taken by surprise. So, he stammered at first.

"Rory, this is- This is Luke. I know you won't return my call, or any of your mother's, but- … This took us by surprise. And we- … I don't care why you did it. Just- Tell me that our little One is OK. We love that kid. … And you. Tell me you're both fine. We don't need to know where you are; it's your right to stay away. Just, please, tell me you're OK."

Lorelai and Luke couldn't remember when and how they fell asleep that night. It was one of the worst nights they ever had in their lives. It was only the first of many awful nights to follow, but they didn't know that yet.

The morning came and neither of them found the energy to get out of bed, to face reality with work and a normal, daily routine. Especially, since their daily routine was so rudely mixed up and ripped apart the day before. Nothing would ever be the same again.

When Luke, eventually, made his way out of bed to get Lorelai some coffee, he noticed his phone was flashing a small green light. He flipped it open and found a little envelope on the left corner. He didn't know what it meant and gave it to Lorelai to check. He thought some distraction of ordinary life and his incapability of dealing with technology would do her good.

He smiled to himself, when she took the phone and the cup of coffee with a typical Lorelai frown, rolling her eyes. She pushed a few buttons on the phone and then, her gaze shifted. She looked stunned, and held the phone to him. On then display was a short message, saying, "We're OK. - Rory."

Lorelai dropped to phone to the bed, biting her lips. She shrugged and said, "I know she had to spread her wings sometime, but I never thought it would be like this."

* * *

 _Are you OK after this? I hand you a virtual tissue, and hope you'll forgive me for this. But if you're angry, then I'll also understand. I got angry with AS-P for the last four words and this is my way of dealing with it. The last four words and the concept of full circle upset me, and here I am taking this story COMPLETELY full circle now, no happily ever after. Let's watch this go down in the next chapter even more. Are you in? xxx_


	3. Chapter 3

_Thanks for staying with me and the story. I really appreciate it because it's not the most joyful concept and I think there are people out there, who wouldn't agree with this, but that's OK._

 _If you're like me and listen to music when you read fanfiction; then, I recommend listening to "Elizabeth Taylor" by Clare Maguire. I listened to that song on repeat while writing and editing this chapter in particular. It's a beautiful song and it will get you in the right mood for this week's intense chapter._

 _So, without further ado, enjoy reading._

* * *

 **Third Chapter: The Other Children**

In contrast to the time Lorelai and Rory weren't speaking in 2005, Lorelai didn't pretend everything was all right this time around. She didn't hide her hurt in front of Luke. Quite the contrary was happening, she let herself be weak when she was with him. He was there to catch her at her weakest. He was there to comfort her. He was there.

He did everything a husband was supposed to do. He was her solid rock, her support system, and her safety net. It felt nice to have someone around, who would have her back, unconditionally. He understood why she couldn't leave the bed for a month because the mourning used up all her energy. There was no other way of living than lying in bed. She was too weak to stand up, to stand a chance in a daily life with the knowledge that her daughter and grandchild were gone.

Luke handled stuff around her and kept the daily life away from her. He made sure she had enough to eat and drink. He ensured she was entertained as much as it was possible in that dreadful time. He was selfless while she mourned, but his breakdown was bound to happen. He couldn't be the ever-strong man he pretended to be. He had feelings too. Rory left him too. He was not made out of steel; he was a softy inside.

One evening, their built-up emotions crashed and a big fall-out followed. Words of anger were spoken, not directed towards each other, but the words made their frustration with the situation very clear. The tension had reached an unbearable level and something like that had to happen.

Luke was half-way through one of his rants, venting his spleen about their situation. His voice filled with frustration, deep and echoing through the bedroom, as he paced through the room. He couldn't sit still when he was in ranting-mode.

"It's the first time I'm not in the middle of this. I mean, I _am in_ the middle of this fight, but I'm on your side. The first time ever Rory chose to go against me too. She did not only leave you, she left _me_ as well. The letter said 'Dear Mom _and_ Luke'. I did something wrong too, Lorelai!" He yelled, looking at Lorelai sitting on the bed, the bended knees pulled in front of her. Her chin rested on the knees, she watched him patiently, letting the words sink in.

Afterwards, Luke let himself fall down at the end of the bed, not facing Lorelai, turning his back towards her. He drew a heavy sigh, as he ran a hand through his hair. He continued a little calmer, "This time I can't fix things. Rory's angry with me, I can't remember one time she was angry with me. And it sucks. It sucks a lot, but I can't change it, right?"

He leaned forward to lean his right elbow on his thigh and then rested his forehead against his head. He was exhausted, after getting this all out. He took deep breaths, panting. The words had been stored inside him for a month. There was no one who he could talk to. His best friend had not been reachable in the last four weeks, as had been his wife.

Lorelai crawled across to bed to him, first placing a hand gently on his shoulder. When he didn't remove himself from her touch, she leaned her forehead against his back. Leaning closer and closer, eventually having her face buried against his back. The flannel of his shirt pressed softly against her skin. She stayed there for a while, giving them both the time to compose themselves. She drew little circles against the flannel on this shoulder, trying to reconnect with him like this. Eventually she mumbled in an apologetic tone, almost sighing, "Babe."

Luke leaned further forward, burying his forehead in his hand, clearly exhausted. He had reached his breaking point; he could not longer be the strong one, the one, who did everything to keep the household and their lives running. He needed someone to be there for him as well; he could not be longer the strong shoulder, Lorelai was so naturally leaning against, taking it for granted, only seeing her own hurt and not anyone else's pain. He lifted his head, to turn it over his left shoulder, telling Lorelai, "We're both hurting."

She nodded against his back, burying her face even deeper into the flannel – if that was even possible. The room was filled with her sobs again, the flannel catching her tears as they ran down her cheeks. Crying had become a natural habit in the last weeks.

Luke would comfort her soon, he always did; it was his job as her best friend and husband. But he had to get all of the words out first. She had to understand. Her soft nodding against his back had not been enough for. He wanted her to say something, to react to it with more than just a nod of her head. He had always done so much more than nodding when she expressed her hurt. He stated, "We both lost them."

Lorelai gripped the flannel at his waist tightly in her hands, clutching to it. Her sobs were not as deep anymore, not as sharp anymore. They left her weak, made her voiceless, but she managed to get two words out, whispering them, "I know."

Luke exhaled, dropping his shoulders. He could relax more and more. Finally, he was able to release all the pent up emotion he had been carrying around for the last weeks. I took a lot of baggage of his shoulders. They felt lighter, and could be loaded with new stuff in the future. Finally, Lorelai understood and saw him with this pain. Finally, she was not the only one allowed to feel hurt. He turned around, pushing her away leaning against his shoulder. He tipped her head up to meet his eyes, and said, "Don't ever think I don't feel anything. OK?"

She nodded again. Her eyes were reddened from the crying. Luke couldn't take the sight and brought his left arm around her shoulder, gathering her into his arms, letting her bury her nose into his chest, the flannel pressing against her cheek, just like before. They were finally weak together. His hug gave her as much comfort as her hug gave to him. After a month, they were feeling the hurt together and that made it easier, for both of them.

The last weeks had debilitated them. The hurt had consumed Lorelai, while Luke was keeping up with life and her pain. They were exhausted; the last month was exhausting them. It was good to just be for a moment; to be just a moment together. Eventually, Lorelai looked up to meet his gaze again, his blue eyes staring back at her; they were smaller than usual. The spark in his eyes when he looked at her was gone too; it was overshadowed by the loss they had experienced. She reached her right hand out to cup his jaw, and said softly, "I'm sorry."

She meant it. She meant her apology and she knew he forgave her, when he put his hand over her hers, making sure she couldn't withdraw her hand any moment. He was relieved that she finally saw him.

They spent the day being in pain together. They hadn't done that ever since Rory had left. It had always been Lorelai hurting and Luke comforting her, and it had never been the both of them being in pain together.

At the end of the day, they decided it was time to face a daily life again, creating a routine to get through the day. Rory wouldn't be coming back any time soon and life had to go on.

It took them a couple of weeks to adapt to the new routine, no preparing food for the little One, no changing diapers or talking about who would watch the little One. Their daily routine was not as tight anymore, which made it even clearer that people were missing.

* * *

The upcoming of the holidays didn't help either. It disturbed their new routine, which they had come up so carefully. The holidays were supposed to be spent with family, and this time around their family would not be complete. At first, they were set to skip the holidays, but April would be spending Thanksgiving with them. Luke and Lorelai were actually looking forward to seeing April again. She was the only child Lorelai and Luke had left, except for Paul-Anka, who couldn't handle all the love they had to give.

As April visited them for Thanksgiving, Lorelai took the opportunity to write the Christmas cards. She didn't want to fake April's signature like last year. She grabbed the cards she had picked sometime earlier this year. She found a sticky note on them, reminding herself that she wanted to include a photo, the picture she had taken on Labour Day. Her intention was to include the photo with the Christmas cards, sending it to the people she knew and to show off what a happy family they were.

It hurt her looking at the picture; April finally having the guts and holding the toddler, Rory and Luke smiling next to her, while Luke held Paul-Anka on his lap, just like Lorelai had asked him to. They were picture perfect back then. It was the last time they were perfect together. The picture showed the idyllic world, which was not meant to last.

In the end, Lorelai decided against sending the cards with the picture. Too many questions would approach her if she did. It was no secret that she and Rory weren't speaking anymore, and she didn't know if that circumstance would change any time soon.

Still, Lorelai hoped the holidays would provide her with a miracle, just like the ones you would see in the movies happening around the Christmas-time. Luke suggested she should text Rory, ask her for her plans for Christmas, invite her home. People always came home for the holidays. Luke was right. People usually came home for the holidays.

However, Rory didn't return Lorelai's invitation for Christmas or the spontaneous invitation for Thanksgiving. Rory blocked Lorelai out completely, just like she said in that letter she left them behind. It was like the whole world of social media and easy communication via calls and texts did not exist. They were back to the Middle Ages, when communicating was a real hassle.

When Lorelai noticed Rory didn't even read her messages anymore, she was going crazy. The two ticks didn't turn blue anymore. No blue ticks. Rory froze her out completely, on all levels, not even acknowledging her mother anymore and that hurt Lorelai the most.

April, however, tried calming her down, when she said that people could deactivate the read receipts and no blue ticks would show even though the person had read the message. It calmed Lorelai's nerves just for a minute or two, but she freaked over that fact again. Why would Rory deactivate Rory the read receipts?

Lorelai couldn't understand, and neither could April, who couldn't take another 50-something freaking out over the new technique; her mother was a thunderstorm when it came to phones and managed to take it down within seconds, whereas her father was a nightmare, who wouldn't even show any interest into these kinds of things. To him, it was still 2004 when he first bought his first and only cell-phone to stay in contact with Lorelai.

April excused herself, left Lorelai alone in the living room and went upstairs to seek some quiet in the little room she had claimed her own. She tried to think of something to calm Lorelai down about the blue ticks not showing up anymore. She picked up her phone and was about to google for a solution, when she opened her massaging app instead. She decided to text Rory herself. The ticks didn't turn blue right away either, but April didn't put much thought into it; not all people were attached to their phones like her and Lorelai and replied to massages the minute they got it. Rory had probably her hands full with caring for and dealing with her kid.

In the end, April's little message was not as important; even tough she asked casually about her well-being and an update on the kid she was an aunt to. She had even dared to use the n-word, for the first time ever. Rory would know she was seriously worrying about them, when she would read it. April never got the chance to fully embrace the role in the kid's life because Rory left before April could do all the aunty-things she had planned to do once the little human-being had created a personality and was able to take care of natural human needs without anyone's help.

Whenever April saw a light blinking on her phone, she checked it and was over and over again disappointed when it was a message from a friend or a notification from one of the dozens of apps she used on a regular basis.

When she didn't receive an answer within two hours, she checked to see if the two ticks had turned blue and was shocked to see they were still grey. Rory had actually deactivated the read receipts; April frowned and checked other social platforms, she knew Rory and she were engaged in, but she was surprised to not find her in her list of friends or followers anymore. Rory had blocked her out of her life, just like she did with Lorelai, Luke, and Emily.

Even tough they were stepsisters, they weren't too close, they got along fine and April enjoyed talking to her. But they never had the chance to grow close to each other. Their parents had kept them mostly separate within their nine-year long relationship before they had gotten married.

In the few months after their marriage, they all grew together as a family. Lorelai and Luke would invite April down to Connecticut on a regular basis, even driving up to Boston to visit her and then take her with them to Stars Hollow. Rory and April had seen each other more often, they had developed a sisterly bond, which also included necking Lorelai and Luke about being to over-protective of the youngest family-member. Sometimes they would talk about books, however, Rory couldn't keep up with all the new publications anymore; her time was limited and her child took a lot of her reading time away.

That was why April didn't understand why she had been cut out off Rory's life as well. She was stunned about Rory's decision, trying to analyse what might be the reason and why she was blocked out of Rory's life too, but social interactions weren't her strength and she couldn't come up with a reasonable explanation.

She told Lorelai and her dad at breakfast the next morning. They were just as stunned as her. She finally asked, "Was it because I said 'it' and refused to use the n-word? I liked that little human-being, who yet had to develop a personality. That human-being had potential and I'm just not the baby-kind-of-person. That's not my fault and not a reason to cut me out of her life this rudely."

April worked her up into a state, gesticulating more than she usually would. Her hands were flying around in front of her, expressing the disbelief. Luke caught her hands and pushed them back to the table, squeezing them as he said, "We know that."

"But she apparently doesn't, otherwise she wouldn't have cut me out. You, guys, did too much, and I did not enough, right?" April said, while grabbing the fork again, concentrating on the food her father had prepared for them, the pancakes looked delicious.

Lorelai looked up from her plate, tiling her head to the side, and said softly, "Sweetie, it's more likely she cut you off because you're close to us."

April frowned and shook her head, sulking, she said, "I could have kept quiet."

"No you wouldn't", Luke said and looked amused to April, who would first look annoyed and then give him a scowl, which would amuse Luke even more. Lorelai jumped in and confirmed Luke's statement, "You're really bad at lying."

April couldn't argue that, she was never able to keep a secret for long. The way she said things always gave her away. April finally understood why she was cut out off Rory's life and she now felt the hole her father and Lorelai must feel with Rory gone. She never gave much thought about Rory and the little spitting it being there or not, but right now she could feel the void Rory had left by taking off and cutting all of them off her life.

The dining room seemed empty with just three people sitting around the table instead of four and a half. The chats seemed slower, without Rory stepping in and explaining all the theories and technical terms April used around herself so carelessly. She relied on Rory for understanding them and if felt good to have someone in the family to understand what she was talking about. It was refreshing to talk to someone whose face wouldn't turn into blunt confusion, like Lorelai and Luke's.

Lorelai would compensate her lack of knowledge by telling a joke, which confused April, while Luke would ask for the meaning of certain words, which would annoy her. They both tried, but it never fulfilled April to talk to them. Rory could keep up, not every time, her resort was never biology, chemistry, or physics, but she had a basic knowledge April could count on. And whenever April dared to discuss humanities, arts or social studies, Rory was hooked and they were on equal footing.

Now, however, the conversations died down; April wouldn't talk about the stuff she learned in college anymore, she tried, but even she could sense that it made them all uncomfortable and miserable. Sometimes, Luke, Lorelai, and she sat in complete silence at the dinner table, like now, but she couldn't take it any longer. As they sat down for dinner in the evening, April stated, "This is ridiculous."

"The meal?" Lorelai asked, picking at her food with caution. "Yeah. Luke, hon, I-"

"Not the food." April clarified and rolled her eyes slightly. Looking down on her plate, she added quickly, giving Luke a side-glance, "even though, Dad, what were you thinking?"

Luke frowned, digging into the meal, not giving in to the comments he'd get from the girls. He was used to those. After he swallowed, he said, "what were you talking about? This is a meal that I prepared for the two of you with much love, as I like to remind you. Without my cooking, you two would starve to death. You're complete catastrophes in the kitchen. What would you do?"

Lorelai and April locked eyes because they had heard about their incapacity of cooking often enough. They both had come up with a strategy to live without cooking. They counted in their head to three and then said it out loud at once.

"Order in", Lorelai said.

"Eat out", April said.

They smiled at each other, and laughed at their choices. Luke laughed for a moment too, but he was not able to hold back an eye-roll. When they calmed down, April said, "I was actually talking about this ridiculous silence at the dinner table. It's mucksmäuschenstill." Lorelai and Luke shot her another confused look, but April put if off with a dismissive wave of her hand, her comment was not important. "We're three adults and have nothing to talk about? What are the chances for that?"

Lorelai and Luke studied her for a moment, April's eyes were drifting off to a corner of the room, not longer watching them, then Luke asked, "Are you calculating the chances at the moment?"

"I might be." April bit her lip and grabbed her phone to write down a note to remind her to do the calculation later when there was more time.

"What are you suggesting? We use topic cards to engage into conversation?" Lorelai asked curiously, her the tone in her voice sounded familiar to her mocking tone.

Luke exchanged a look with her and shook his head. He said, "Here's an idea. You can talk about anything you want, we'll listen. Don't make it any science-related. Talk about the German silent films you love so much."

"I moved to sound film, still German though." April told them, her voice dying down for a minute, but then she suggested, "You'd watch one with me?"

Luke and Lorelai nodded and exchanged smiles. They couldn't refuse her that wish. Their only daughter would share parts of her life with them. They couldn't deny her that, even less when April got excited about the idea of watching a German film together.

They were pleasantly surprised how well made the German films were. They usually dealt with a heavy topic, circling around the Second World War, but the acting was great, not that they understood much. They were forced to read the subtitles, but April was happy to explain anything they didn't understand at once. Her German lessons finally paid off.

April was on fire. She never stopped talking about it, telling Luke and Lorelai about her German lessons, about her journey to Germany. Telling them about the food, the culture, the music, and the people. Lorelai engaged with some of her stories from visiting Germany. April and Lorelai would then mock Luke for never being to Europe, and rave about it.

The three of them were able to overcome the awkwardness of being just the three of them. Lorelai and Luke were especially happy that April was able to take their minds of the hole Rory left with taking their grandchild away. Two of Lorelai and Luke's babies were gone and they clung to April whenever she was around.

Luke and Lorelai were relieved when April struggled with her future, she actually told them about it and let them in to help her decide. They decided it would be best if April did her doctorate and not went into a full-time job. They discussed financing, which also included some tutoring lessons, which would help April improve her social and teaching skills. She would need them later on because doing her doctorate would include some teaching lessons.

Lorelai and Luke would do everything for April and at the same time they were scared to push too much, to do too much, to give too much. In the end, that was what drove Rory away and neither Luke nor Lorelai could take another child running from them. They only had one left.

Well, two if you counted Paul-Anka, but Luke would refuse to be called his Doggy-daddy. However, Lorelai would always refer to him as Daddy when she talked to Paul-Anka. Luke knew about that, but he was glad Lorelai respected his wish not to be called the dog's father whenever he was in hearing distance. They both knew she did at any other occasion anyway.

Things changed when Paul-Anka got sick. The vet repeated over and over again that Paul-Anka was very old and it was natural for him to be not as lively as he used to be, but Lorelai refused to accept it and did everything she could to prolong his life. Every treatment. She bought the special food, which was good for elder dogs; it had a lot of vitamins. She'd bought him a new doggy-bed, and every week she bought a new toy, which Paul-Anka would hardly touch because he refused to play. Most of them time, he was sleeping, or was somewhere snuggled up.

Lorelai did her best to get him the best life an old dog like Paul-Anka could ask for. Even Luke put extra effort in for the dog. He would not roll his eyes anymore, when he prepared a steak for him and blow on it to cool it off. He'd voluntarily let Paul-Anka sleep in bed with Lorelai and him. He'd pat him whenever he was close.

Luke and Lorelai would take the chance and walk him together; they weren't rushing anymore to get it over with. It was no longer a hassle, but something they actually enjoyed.

However, eventually, one day in spring 2019, the inevitable had to happen. When Lorelai returned home one day, Paul-Anka was lying motionless on the doggie-bed next to the couch. He looked liked he was sleeping, but Lorelai instantly knew something was up, when he didn't lift his head to acknowledge her arrival.

She called Luke and he took care of the dead body. Afterwards, he gave her the comfort she clearly needed after this loss. To Luke, it would seem this marriage was one long comforting session. He had gotten used to it, he knew how to hug Lorelai and what words to say. He had mastered the skill of comforting.

They were both reminded of the loss they had experienced just six months ago, however, even though Lorelai wanted to, she didn't bother reaching out to inform Rory about Paul-Anka's passing. Rory hadn't returned any of Lorelai's texts in the last months, so why would she now?

The house was empty with Paul-Anka gone. Well, not really empty, there was still a lot of stuff lying around, but to Lorelai it felt empty. There was the TV to fill the house with noise, but it couldn't live up to real noise. It couldn't replace the bark of a real dog, or the footstep of a real dog going around, or the panting as a dog would go up and down the stairs, or the munching as a dog ate his stake.

Luke made noise when he walked, or ate, or cooked, but it was not the same. When Lorelai and he sat both on the couch in the living room, they couldn't hear any noise in the house. It was spooky, like something was about to happen soon. The creepy silence before a murderer would jump out behind a door.

The house was empty. Luke and Lorelai were alone. Being alone at a stressful time felt tempting, a dream-state you longed for. But when being along became a permanent condition, you longed for noise, for some action, which would be added to the couple-life.

Lorelai caught herself looking forward to meeting Babette when she came home or left for work. She used to hate it when Babette caught her when she arrived home after a long day, but now she enjoyed chatting to her, listening to her cat-stories or the latest town-gossip.

Further, Lorelai caught herself spending extra time at the Diner, just to hang there, not to eat or help closing up.

She caught herself suggesting Luke to invite people for dinner. She dragged him outside the house as often as he could, just to get out of their empty house. Just six months ago, there were a dog, a daughter, and a grandchild, which filled the house with noise, but above all life and love.

It never crossed Lorelai's mind to get another dog. No dog could ever replace Paul-Anka. It was love at first sight, a once in a lifetime human-dog-relationship that no other dog could ever live up to. Paul-Anka was her dog-soulmate. She would only get one, so why even try with another dog?

Luke and Lorelai carried on with their lives as well as they could. Every now and then, they would have a relapse, sulking in the sadness, which had overshadowed their marriage. Sometimes, they sought the comfort of old memories intentionally. They snuggled up on the couch together; Luke leant his head against Lorelai's, as she flipped through the photos of happier times on her phone. Luke, now, was indeed happy, she had insisted on taking all these pictures of them and the grandchild, whose life they were missing out on. They imagined how much the kid must have grown already and if the first words might already be spoken.

In one of these weak moments, they understood what went wrong, why they were no longer in the child's life. They had treated their grandchild as their own child. They both had wished more for a child of their own than they had let themselves believe. That was why they were doing things grandparents shouldn't be doing. They had overstepped the bounds and now they had to live with the consequences.

Even though, Rory's absence brought a lot of sadness to their marriage, in the end, it brought them closer together as well. Rory had left them both, Rory was fed up with both of them. And this bound them together. The parents against the kid, the kid went against the parental units.

Lorelai imagined what her leaving all these years ago must have done to her parents' marriage. She took the opportunity to speak about it with her mother, when Luke and Lorelai visited her for Christmas in Nantucket. It was their second Christmas without Rory and her kid. The change of location did Lorelai and Luke good. And so did the scotch Lorelai and Emily shared in the evening.

"I understand now, what you had to go through, Mom, and I admire you. Sometimes standing tall seems impossible and there are days I can't imagine ever smiling again or not feeling this hole", Lorelai said.

"That hole will always be there, but you'll forget about it from time to time", Emily said, absentmindedly swinging what was left of the scotch in her glass back and forth. Finally, she brought the glass to her lips and finished the liquor off.

"Is it gonna be there forever?" Lorelai had a chill running down her arms. She pulled the cardigan tighter around her body, trying to fight the chill, which was spreading in the house. The cool winter air was being blown from the Atlantic Ocean. The thin walls couldn't keep the cold from entering the house. It was gradually, but you could notice anyhow.

"Unfortunately, yes." Emily whispered and placed the empty glass on the table in front of her. The nightcap was drunk, now would be the time to head off to bed. Luke, Berta and her family had left for bed an hour ago, but Lorelai invited Emily to have another glass of scotch. Emily couldn't deny her daughter a wish like that.

Lorelai sighed, shifting in her seat, putting the feet back on the floor, no longer sitting on them. She sat straighter, but the words she spoke revealed fragility, "There are a lot of holes in my heart. I collected them over the years and it's hard."

"It is, but you're stronger than you think." Emily emphasised, watching her daughter, looking at the hands on her lap. She looked dreadful like this; she needed cheering up, which this get-away for Christmas could give her. She certainly seemed more relaxed with every day she spent here. Sometimes, Emily noticed Lorelai losing her guard and would see her rest a hand on Luke's shoulder, show him affection even though Emily was present in the room. Emily had never seen her daughter more comfortable in a relationship than this.

Emily took in a breath, and added, "In fact, you're the strongest person I know."

Lorelai looked up to meet her mother's gaze, a small smile on her lips, as she replied, "I learned from the best."

"Oh, I'm nothing." Emily waved it dismissively off, standing up to get to bed. She took the two empty glasses from the coffee table and was about to leave the room, when Lorelai stated quickly, "No! You've been through what I've been through, and then Dad."

Lorelai paused. She couldn't imagine what a life without Luke would look like. Her mother was certainly strong because Lorelai knew her father meant to her mother just as much as Luke meant to her. "Please, Mom, can you take this compliment?"

Emily stared back at her daughter, but eventually clicked her tongue in disapproval, and said what good manners forced her to, a small smile playing on her lips, "Thank you, Lorelai."

They said their good-nights and Emily brought the glasses into the kitchen. Berta would wash them up in the morning. Emily replayed the exchange with her daughter in her head, and it hurt her that she could feel the hurt with every word her daughter had spoken. Lorelai opened up to her more and more, especially at their nightly drinks they had been sharing in the last few days since her arrival in Nantucket.

However, the more Emily knew about Lorelai's emotional baggage, the less she could take it. She couldn't take this situation anymore, which was nothing but a big pile of bullshit and she was set to fight it. She had to. Life sucked with Richard's absence too much and she couldn't take another part of her life going to hell. It was nonsense and it was finally time to knock some sense into her granddaughter.

Emily couldn't longer watch and sit still. Her daughter was hurting more than ever, and even though she liked they were closer than ever now, she couldn't look another minute at the miserable person Lorelai had become. Yes, she had seen her smile at some point, but it was only half a smile. Emily knew form personal experience what this felt like.

Getting your heart ripped out, never felt good. Even if it would be placed back some time; you could always tell there was a time without a heart. The wounds would always be there. The time without a heart would never be forgotten.

Emily got a notebook and wrote down to call one of her friends from a former life, in which she was a lady of high society. She would ask him for the best private detective, who would track down people, and get all the dirty secrets about them, which would be delivered fast. It had to be done rather sooner than later. Another Christmas like this would destroy any joy that might be left in Lorelai.

* * *

 _Are you with me? Lorelai is at the bottom of it all. Poor thing. There's too much hurt going on in her life. What do you think? Do you have any hopes for an improvement? Next week, I'll publish the final chapter of this instalment._

 _Btw, I'm obsessed with the April AS-P gave to us in the revival, she's so relatable and I'd be friends with her, for sure. Her fascination with German stuff freaked me out a lot, and I had to include it again. In case you're wondering,_ mucksmäuschenstill _means_ to be completely quiet _or_ to be quiet as a mouse _._

 _Oh, and the whole Luke and Paul-Anka dynamic was adorable in the revival, so I had to address that as well._

 _OK, enough of my thoughts. Please let me know what you think. (: See you next week. xxx_

 _edit: I made some changes to make the time-line clearer, a guest-reviewer complained about my timeline being wishy-washy, but I unlike ASP (e.g. April is born 1993, so in Summer (2016) she'd be 23 and not 22) have a timeline I stick to: Rory left in Autumn 2018, so April was over for Thanksgiving in 2018!, Paul-Anka died in Spring 2019 and the Christmas Lorelai and Luke spend in Nantucket is 2019. It's chronicle. Thanks for pointing that out to me, I hope it's more understandable now. And, dear guest-reviewer, I wished you'd register, I'm eager to answer your questions and respond to your review._


	4. Chapter 4

**Forth Chapter: Turning Point**

A few weeks later, sometime in early February of 2020, Emily held a report on her granddaughter in her hands. The private detective, who was recommended to her, did exactly what she had paid him for. Emily skimmed through the pages, reading what the private investigator had found out about Rory.

She lived in New York, in an apartment-building, in which all the inhabitants looked out for each other; it was a community, filled with artsy and extraordinary personalities, but some of them had profound professions like doctors and lawyers as well. A little like Stars Hollow, Emily figured, but with a touch of the high society of Hartford, which Rory had grown into in her teenage years.

The apartment block was rather close to the airport, which was good, so Logan could easily fly in and out as much as he could. He took his part in his child's life seriously. After all, he was the father and not that Paul.

Logan did everything to support the child and was involved very much, but Rory drew strict lines with him. However, their feelings for each other came in between over and over again. Logan was trapped in a marriage he was pressured into by his family, and bound to a job, which forced him to stay in London. Rory and Logan's what-happened-in-Vegas-stayed-in-Vegas-policy didn't work anymore with a baby in the picture.

It was hopeless. For now at least. Emily sighed when reading that. At least the child had a father in his life, she thought. A child needed a mother and a father.

If they ever became a real family, Rory wanted it to be under the right circumstances and it involved both, a divorce and a move back to the states. Logan didn't see any of this happening soon; the premarital agreement Odette had signed made it impossible for him to just leave right this second. That was why a future together got pushed away, and they concentrated on their child and not so much on each other.

Rory had to concentrate on her work anyhow; she still wrote. Writing was her destiny, but she was published under a pseudonym ever since she broke contact with her mother. The topics she wrote about had changed too. Having a child opened up a new set of topics to write about and the political situation the country and the world was in forced her to write too. She felt the need to report and to do research. She was part of a team, which had formed to fight untruths on social media platforms. Research had always been her favourite part of producing an article. It entailed reading and reading was one of two worlds Rory had always lived in. She could live from her writing now and could provide for her child.

Emily was impressed with the detective's work, but she wondered how he had gotten this kind of information; it seemed at points very intimate and too detailed. She asked him about his sources and ways to get a hand on information like this. But the investigator shrugged the question off, asking her, if it was important how he had gotten the information. Emily smiled politely and supposed, in the end, it was not.

She scheduled a trip to New York soon; Jack accompanied her, but she insisted upon going to the apartment on her own. This was her business; he shouldn't be involved. She climbed the stairs to the third floor, where Rory was living and rang the doorbell. She could hear voices behind the door and waited patiently for the door to open. It did and Rory looked at her startled, not even being in the position to greet her.

Emily pursed her lips and made her way through the door, not waiting to be asked inside. She had a look through the apartment, taking in how her granddaughter chose to live. Emily opened the buttons on her coat, taking the gloves off, loosening the scarf around her neck. New York was kept firmly in winter's hand.

Rory closed the door, followed her grandmother to the living room. She offered her a seat and then a drink, anything that would make this encounter a little less awkward and more pleasant, but Emily rejected both.

"That's how you live now?" Emily asked, as she turned around some more, adding a little more substance to her words. Behind her was a big bookshelf loaded with most of Rory's books. The bottom shelves were stuffed with toys and children's books.

Rory knew this was a rhetorical question and it didn't need to be answered. She waited for her grandmother to get out what she had to say and then leave her alone. She was not prepared to fight, she was caught unprepared, and Rory liked to be prepared. Instead, Rory crossed her arms in front of her chest, trying to shield herself at least a little from the insults, which were bound to follow.

"I think you know why I'm here." Emily said and placed her handbag on the couch, which looked a little worn out. Colourful cushions were placed on it. It reminded her of Lorelai's awful couch, which she would refuse to get rid of for years.

Rory nodded in response and took a deep breath, trying to gain as much energy as she could to stay strong throughout the words her grandmother would say.

"You crushed your mother. You leaving her with your child, crushed her, and she's hurting. Everybody can see it. Your mother is hurting, and I'm not leaving this planet with my daughter heart-broken. She did _nothing_ to deserve this, young lady. She doesn't deserve to be cut out of this child's life." Emily pointed to where she thought the child's room was.

"You don't even give the child a chance. It's your business to cut your mother out, Luke, or me. Or anybody, who used to be close to you. If you think that's the right thing for you to do, then do it. If you think we're all so bad when caring for you and that child of yours, then it's your decision to make, but even _your mother_ maintained contact with us. Not much and it was not pleasant or filled with love, but she let us see you once a year." Emily watched Rory shifting from one foot to the other, her head tilted. With the arms crossed in front her, she looked annoyed, but Emily carried on nevertheless. Knocking sense into someone was never fun.

"I won't sit back and watch history repeating itself. I missed out on a lot of things with you. I wasn't there to see you grow up." Emily knew better than to let the past defeat her. She had made her peace with it and enjoyed every moment she was allowed to see Rory growing and becoming a young woman. Emily sighed and pushed that thought away.

"And your mother has nothing but love to give to your child. She loves her grandchild, unconditionally. And it's not fair that you deny that child this kind of love. The love of a grandmother can't be replaced with the love of some _strangers_ you just met here in this building." Emily waved her hand dramatically in front of her.

"Don't talk to your mother for years, I don't care, you're more like her than what's good for you. You're just as stubborn as her, but _you should_ _know better_. You're heading to where I was with your mother once. So, I tell you to break that cycle. Give your mother her grandchild; she doesn't need more. Just this little human-being. If you have any decency at all left in that selfish and reckless woman you've become, then you work up the courage to let your mother see her grandchild." Emily was on fire, talking faster with every word she spoke. These words should have been said a long time ago. It felt good to finally say them out loud, to Rory's face, saying things she held back for so long.

"I don't give a damn about seeing that great-grandchild anymore. I'll never be as important to that child as Lorelai will be. She's just 51 and a grandmother, for goodness sake! She'll be in this kid's life for a _very_ long time and you're spoiling this child's chance on knowing one of the most-loving person I came across. What you do is nothing but a childish act and shows that you're not ready to have a child yourself. Get this right again or you'll regret this all your life. And let me tell you, you don't want to live with a burden like this. Your mother and I can both tell you about it." Emily finished off with a softer tone, letting the words hang in the air. She didn't want to hear any explanations on Rory's behalf. She was not interested in that, so, eventually, she took her handbag again, and left Rory's apartment, leaving back a stunned Rory.

There was no way Rory could ignore an Emily-Gilmore-speech. Whatever she said was a command. Rory had seen her grandmother often angry, outrageous at moments, when a maid was too incompetent for her own good. She had witnessed a lot of speeches, but this one was the most powerful she had ever seen. It contained all the insults and arguments, which gave you a bad conscience and made you feel guilty, small, and the worst human-being on the world.

In the end, Emily Gilmore always got what she wanted. She knew how to get it; she was the true master with words in the family. It was never Lorelai, and certainly not Rory, even though she was the one achieving a career with words. Emily Gilmore could persuade a strong-willed vegan to hunt down his beloved pet, kill and grill it, and make him enjoy eating it.

What Emily tried persuading Rory to do, felt awfully similar to that. She was sent to the lion's cave with the demand Emily requested her to do, giving her mother her grandchild, reuniting her child with a grandmother. It took her a couple of days, but she, eventually, worked up the courage to fulfil Emily's command. There was no way of escaping from the Gilmore-family.

* * *

Lorelai couldn't believe when she saw a text-message from her daughter on her phone. It was not her stepdaughter, but the daughter she had not heard from in the last one and a half years. The text-message was short, but Rory suggested Lorelai should see her grandchild again. Lorelai read the message over and over again until she was sure she didn't misunderstand it. She was jumping up and down in her seat, bouncing in her happiness.

Luke, sitting next to her, didn't understand at first what was happening to her. He rolled his eyes and concentrated on the TV again, not paying attention to Lorelai's outburst of joy, which was probably caused by another ridiculous picture April had sent her.

"She has reached out to us. She's finally reached out!" Lorelai gushed, bringing her hand in front of her mouth in disbelief. Behind the hand, a big smile spread across her lips.

Luke couldn't ignore Lorelai when she was speaking with a voice as joyful as the one she was using at the moment. He hadn't heard that voice in a very long time. He instantly knew something big was happening, so he stopped the movie they were watching and asked with one eyebrow raised, "Who has reached out?"

"Rory! Rory has reached out to us." Lorelai exclaimed, and placed her hand on Luke's chest in excitement. Her smile was brightening up all of her face. Luke returned her smile. Lorelai had no other choice than to bring those two smiles together, she had to kiss Luke. She had to share her gladness, and framed his face, crashing her lips to his. She put all of her joy into the kiss. And the chaste kiss of happiness soon grew heated. Tongues asked for entrance into the other's mouth. Hands roamed the other's body, trying to get the other just a little bit closer, searching for skin on skin contact.

They parted for air, catching their breaths, resting their foreheads against the other's. The hands were still fondling the other's body, caressing. Luke pecked Lorelai's lips again and asked, chuckling, "So, we're ditching the movie tonight?"

"We _are so_ ditching the movie," Lorelai snickered, as she drew his lips to hers again. She couldn't get enough of his kisses. With every kiss they shared, she got happier. She thought she'd explode any minute. The world seemed to overwhelm her with happy feelings.

These feelings stayed the same over the course of the following weeks. However, Lorelai was a little anxious as well. She knew what mistakes she had made to get her into this situation. The weeks gave her time to think about that, but also time to sway in her happiness. The day of the reunion with her grandchild couldn't come fast enough. The thrill of anticipation even drove Luke crazy. They had been grandparents without a grandchild for one and half years and they couldn't go another day without the joy their grandchild had brought to their life.

One day in March, the day they had been waiting for was finally here. Lorelai and Luke met with Rory at the agreed upon site. Lorelai held her breath when she spotted the two of them in the crowd. She squished Luke's hand, which she was holding. Lorelai didn't pay much attention to how Rory looked like because she was distracted by the kid in her arms, who had changed so much since she had last seen.

The reunion was emotional. The kid remembered the grandparents. Rory must have told stories about them, and Lorelai was pleased to notice that. It was not the slightest bit awkward when Luke and Lorelai gathered the kid up in their arms for a group-hug. The kid had reached out to Luke instantly; probably remembering what it was like to be held by him.

Lorelai withdrew herself reluctantly from the hug, but she had to take a look at her daughter. She called after her because she was already leaving them again. "Thank you!"

Rory turned around, shaking her head, and said, "I'm not doing this for you."

"I know." Lorelai looked at the ground, and added without overthinking it too much, "Will you reach out to us when you're ready to let us back in?"

Rory didn't answer. Of course, she had thought about the possibility to get in touch with her mother again, and let her into her life again, but too much had happened in the past. Too much was not sorted out between them and a casual being in each other's life seemed out of place for now.

Lorelai knew all of that, she regretted asking a silly question like that after not discussing the past. She bit her lip when she felt tears in her eyes. There was only one thing she could say. She had thought about that for a while now. Finally, she admitted, "I'm sorry for acting the way I did. Being a good grandmother is not a Gilmore-trait. We're all the worst. Gran, your Grandma, and me."

Rory nodded her head this time, smiling for a second, and headed her way, not looking back at her mother or her child in her stepfather's arms. Lorelai couldn't linger in the sadness she felt, when watching Rory walking away again because the happiness of having the youngest family member in her life outweighed any sadness.

Luke and Lorelai were set on enjoying this day. They arranged a big family gathering, with Emily visiting form Nantucket and April coming home from Boston. They all wanted their fair share of the youngest family member, who had grown into a lovely person with quite some vocabulary. Luke's heart skipped a beat when the kid asked for coffee.

When April heard that, she squealed, making Luke's heart skip another beat. "It can speak!"

"April, sweetie, please, not this again." Lorelai frowned, when she heard her referring to her grandchild as an 'it'. She thought this phase was long over.

However, April didn't listen to Lorelai, she was running to the child, bending down to be on the same eye level. A smile was across her face, when she said with delight, "That little human-being has finally developed a personality and needs no one's help to take care of basic human needs. It's a miracle! Oh my gosh, come here little One, I'm your aunt. You're favourite, most loving Auntie on the whole planet."

The child was at first intimidated by April's enthusiasm, but was eventually brave enough to near April. The red pair of glasses had attracted the kid's attention and April was happy to show the glasses this time. She let the kid try them on, showing all the special things you could do with a pair of glasses.

Eventually, April would take the child to Emily on the couch to read a book out loud. The child was in good company with the great-grandmother and the aunt, who hadn't been together for all this time. They had to make up for lost time, and the kid was not shy at all.

Luke came back from the kitchen; he had started to prepare some coffee for Lorelai, Emily, and April. He sneaked up behind Lorelai and brought his hands around her waist, resting them on her stomach. She leaned into him; his head came to rest on her shoulder. He started to nuzzle the skin on her neck, inhaling her scent, and finally he whispered into her ear, "Do you enjoy this as much as I do?"

Lorelai pressed back against him, smiling to herself, and asked in a low voice, "What? You being all sexy?"

"Not in front of the family," Luke grumbled, but held back laughter as well. It would draw attention to them, and the last thing he wanted was Emily or April watching them, when they stood there so intimately.

"I was not the one starting this compromising embrace." Lorelai countered playfully, not taking her eyes from her grandchild engaged in reading with April and Emily. The sight was too good to be true. She was scared it was all a dream, which would come to an end soon.

"Just, shut up, and watch our daughter with our grandchild." Luke said in a husky voice, pressing a kiss to her temple, the stubble pressing against her skin. It tickled Lorelai a little.

Luke was about to release his arms from her, when she caught them and pulled them tighter around her. She stood in his arms for a few moments longer, not speaking, just watching the three people on the couch. Emily had rolled her eyes more than once when April had failed to make the right voice for a character she was reading. Eventually, Emily took over the reading of the character's lines, while April was in charge of reading the narrative part.

After watching the three for a while, Lorelai stated softly, "I wish Paul-Anka was still with us. He would have loved this."

Luke sighed deeply at this, placing another kiss to her temple. He was about to whisper words of comfort and love to her, when he heard the coffee maker making a noise in the kitchen. He drew her tighter for a second, just to let go off her completely afterwards.

Lorelai was standing again alone close to the staircase, looking at her reunited family. April read the book to the toddler, while Emily watched peacefully, waiting her turn to read the line of a character. A content smile was on Emily's lips. She looked up to see Lorelai staring at her; they locked eyes and exchanged smiles. Then, Emily patted the empty seat next to her. Lorelai took the invitation to join the family fun happily. Four generations of a family were sitting on the couch. It was special and it felt right.

All of the four adults were overjoyed with having the child back in their life, even if only for one day. In their delirium of joy, they did probably too much, hugged the child too often, shown too much affection and love, outdid themselves. They had to make up for lost time. They gave the child every single kiss and squeeze they would have given over the last months. The love exploded and turned into the longest group-hug that was ever seen in this family.

For the first time in a very long time everything felt all right again. They didn't notice that Rory was still missing; they were concentrating on her kid, so her absence was not a big issue. The house was filled with laughter, cheers and happiness.

Eventually, they had to return the source of their joy to the one who had taken it away before and would probably keep it again for a long time.

Luke struggled to handle the child over. On one hand, he didn't want to let go, he just had gotten the child he loved so much back, and on the other hand, the child itself clung to him, and didn't want to let go either. Their tight bond created at the birth was very strong. A child always needed a grandfather. Once this relationship was established, it was hard to be broken. Rory knew well enough what great impact Richard's death did to her all these years ago and it broke her heart a little to see her own child fearing the parting from the grandfather who was loved so much.

Further, Rory noticed Lorelai's eyes were swelling up with tears; the last parting had not been as dreadful as this one because there had not been a parting. Luke and Lorelai had not witnessed a heart-breaking goodbye scene, like you'd see in the movies. On one day they had been all together, talking about everyday stuff, and the next day Rory and her kid had been gone. There had not been time for one last kiss goodbye.

Rory thought it had been best this way and as she watched her mother and Luke struggle to hand her child back, she felt assured of her actions. She took a step towards them, reaching out for her child, who she missed this day. She didn't spend much time apart, only the time, which was absolutely necessary to make a living. Once the child sensed her presence, two arms were stretching in her direction, a smile across both of their faces. She took her child and left quickly, making the parting easier for her child and its grandparents. The loud screams of her child were hurting her ears, but she knew there was no other way.

* * *

After that, Rory evaluated her situation. Seeing her mother again, hearing that apology changed things for her. So, she decided to send Lorelai occasional updates on her kid. She never talked about herself though. Rory included photos in her updates, letting Lorelai be part of the kid's life and growth.

Lorelai was able to persuade Rory to let her see the kid again, turning it into a regular thing. Over time, Lorelai caught little snippets of Rory's life too. Lorelai too shared her life with Rory without asking Rory's permission. She included Rory into her life, even though Rory didn't respond right away to that kind of information. But, eventually, Rory did show interest; nodding to the information she was given, even asking questions.

It was a slow process. Step by step. Day by day. But they grew together again, and Lorelai was over the moon when Rory asked her to come by for coffee after dropping her child off. It was the first time Lorelai was allowed into Rory's apartment and she would mark that day in her calendar to remember it clearly. It was the turning point in their relationship – that day in autumn, about two years after Rory leaving, and four years after Lorelai's wedding to Luke.

The tiptoeing on Lorelai's part ended on that day. A whole lot of pent-up tension unloaded that afternoon. Finally, Rory and Lorelai yelled at each other and cleared the air that way. They said things to each other they had held back for years now.

What Lorelai bothered the most was that Rory had not once voiced her concern, named the things she obviously didn't like. Lorelai never knew something went wrong; she thought everything was all right, and then from one day to the other, her world was turned upside down. "You could have said something." Lorelai reproached.

"I couldn't", Roy said, and Lorelai grimaced at this, which made Rory explain herself, "I couldn't, because you wouldn't listen to me. I expressed my opinion, but to Lorelai Gilmore only mattered what Lorelai Gilmore thought. We did everything your way, with _my_ kid."

"And what? You just gave up, gave in when I didn't hear you the first time?" Lorelai asked back.

"I tried! I told you when I thought something needed to be done differently; that I wanted things done differently, but you wouldn't listen. You waved off, made a joke, changed subjects, misunderstood me or you didn't take me seriously at all. You'd say things like 'trust me', 'I know better' or 'you'll get used to it'. But I didn't get used to it." Rory yelled. "Yes, I was inexperienced in all this raising a kid-stuff, especially in the beginning I was overwhelmed and too much happened in too little time, but everyone's feeling that way when having a kid, right? You should have given me the opportunity to grow, to make my own mistakes. But you couldn't. You wouldn't let me make my mistakes with _my_ kid because it was _your_ grandchild. I didn't know grandchild trumped kid."

Lorelai listened to it. Finally, she heard the reasons behind Rory's action. She couldn't stop the tears filling up her eyes. "Wow, there's a lot of grudge you're holding against me."

"I had some time to build it up." Rory shrugged; she was no longer in state of rage like before. The moment of quiet did not last long because they tackled the next big issue in this fight. It dealt with the reason of Rory's leaving. They argued about the fact that Rory didn't approach Lorelai like any other person would do and discuss things. But Rory once more pointed out that all her attempts had failed, she didn't know any other way to help herself.

"I did exactly the same you had to do when you had me." Rory defended herself.

"The difference is I was 16 when I had you. You on the other hand, were 32." Lorelai pointed out. She didn't like the way Rory justified her actions by telling her this was history repeating itself, and that she was bound to do things like this because history forced her to.

"Still", Rory retorted.

"Still? That's all you got? You know what you're _still_ a child, you're not even close to behaving what a woman in her thirties should. Maybe you are 16 when it comes to this. Maybe you _are_ my 16 year-old-self after all." Lorelai told her, getting frustrated with this.

Rory did too. She scoffed, as she had to put a strand of hair behind her ear because she had shaken her head so much over the course of this discussion. She let go off the accusations and went into attacking mode herself. "But you and Luke are not my kid's parents either! You took my kid away from me. You seriously overstepped boundaries with that. It was not OK, not a bit."

With that, Rory stroke a nerve. Lorelai was very well aware of what made Rory leave. In retrospect, she considered it wrong every time she and Luke had taken the little One to bed with them, but they didn't realise it then. They took over when Rory struggled to embrace the mother-role in the beginning. There was a kid, whose mother was not capable of taking care of it, and two people, who had more love to give. It seemed ideal, but it wasn't in the end.

As soon as Lorelai and Luke had laid eyes on the kid, something had switched a flip in their brains. Suddenly, there had been a kid. A kid Lorelai and Luke had secretly wished for and they had leapt at the chance. It had been now or never. There had been the fresh kid they had been waiting for.

Rory argued that they could have had a kid on their own if they wanted. She argued they could still have a kid of their own, but Lorelai knew better. Chances were slim for them having a kid of their own on the natural way. They had ruled out adoption and the surrogate. Lorelai was 52, and Luke closer to sixty than fifty. It was not realistic and out of place. It had been over for them the second Rory had told them about her pregnancy.

Lorelai had come to terms with the fact. It was OK. Luke and she were happy with each other. Happy with what they had. Happy with the two daughters they could share with each other. And Luke was right dwelling on the past did no good.

But once more, Lorelai had to bring up an issue of the past, which had bothered her in the last two years. It was the fact Rory had blocked them out for good, when it was clear to her Rory hadn't changed her phone number. It hurt Lorelai even more when she knew her daughter chose not to answer her or not to read her messages. It hurt her knowing that her daughter ignored her. A change of numbers like during the last big fallout in 2005 would have made more sense to Lorelai. Rory agreed with her because she had indeed gotten a new phone number, but she had kept the old one as well.

Lorelai didn't understand that. She thought Rory had been fed up with the life she had had before she had gotten pregnant. She thought Rory had been fed up with carrying around more than one phone at once. She sighed dramatically, hiding a smile, as she asked, "So, two phones again?"

"Actually, just one. I have a dual-sim phone now. Very handy. I kept my old number just in case. You know if something happened and you wanted to reach out to me. If someone was ill or… anything really." Lorelai understood now, and she couldn't help but think of Paul-Anka. It was a death Rory didn't know about yet, but she had wished to hear from Lorelai, just in case. This, however, was a conversation for another day.

Rory didn't leave any time to discuss something else anyway because she explained herself some more, "I read all the messages and I was tempted to write you, more than once, but it had to be like this. I needed the time apart from you. It had to be a harsh cut. And I'm sorry. I felt trapped, so I had to break free."

Lorelai knew Rory had to break free. She had said it herself after Rory let Luke and her know she was OK. She always knew Rory would finally stand on her own feet, without her mother's help; even more so when she was a mother herself. She had to, and she had managed.

Eventually, they made up, even though ugly words were spoken. They apologised and made up. And agreed upon the fact that they all made mistakes, which had led them to where they were - in a messy, complicated world, where boundaries were overstepped and voices overheard.

Lorelai and Rory had made up, but their relationship was cracked from now on. It was never again the tight bond they had grown over the years of being the unstoppable mother-daughter-duo.

After all, Lorelai was right that her wedding to Luke was the end of an era. She and Rory were not longer mother and daughter against the world. Both their priorities had shifted, Lorelai's to Luke while Rory had to be there for her child. It was nothing bad that they had new priorities, but they should have handled it better and not holding on to something they could no longer live up to anymore.

They still were the Gilmore Girls; their past defined them to be and there was a book, which proved it. Eventually, they fell back into old routines, watching movies while eating a whole lot of junk food, which would drive Luke crazy. They would gossip and laugh over things other people wouldn't understand, especially April would frown and sigh while struggling to keep up with them. They would discuss fashion and would seek the other's advice on things, but especially Lorelai was reluctant, and always aware of that she might push too much, and push Rory away again. She couldn't go through another time in her life, in which she wouldn't speak to her daughter. She had experienced that four times and one had been worse than the other.

Lorelai understood Emily more and more every day. It took a lot of courage to look past the hurt, which her daughter had caused by leaving. The hurt and the love for her child mixed and were alternating. Sometimes a wave of hurt overcame her and she couldn't stand looking Rory in the eye. Sometimes, the hurt would make her give Rory a bone-crashing hug and never wanting to let go off her ever again. She was so happy that Rory was back in her life.

They all learned to live with the hurt and conflict in the past. Every now and then, it reached the surface again, but it never overtook them and drove them apart. They got past it every single time.

Like any other family, they didn't let the conflict dictate their lives they were sharing with each other. They were able to laugh, enjoying their time together. Overall, they were a happy family, not picture perfect, but that was no longer Lorelai's goal. She didn't hold on to that idea anymore. The pictures she could send with the Christmas cards nowadays were just right. Not too perfect, but not missing anyone either. It looked just right. So right that Lorelai decided to frame the newest family picture and put it to the others on the mantel.

Whenever she let her gaze wander over the pictures sitting there, her wedding picture in the middle always caught her sight. However, she didn't think instantly of it as the beginning of the toughest time in her life anymore. For a very long time, she had gotten carried back to the moment Rory had told her the news of her pregnancy and all the surroundings had been overshadowed with the shock she had felt that moment. For that time, her wedding had been nothing but the start to the race to the bottom, where the big fall-out between Rory and her had happened.

Nowadays, Lorelai didn't even pay attention to the flowers or the decorations in the picture anymore. Whenever she had thought of her wedding in the past, she had not thought of any particular events either. All these events and the surroundings had been overshadowed with Rory's news too long that Lorelai had tried not to reminisce about them often.

In fact, all she saw when looking at the wedding picture was a human being who had developed a personality and had been able to take care of basic human needs without anyone's help for decades. All she could see was Luke. The man she had married. All she thought of when remembering her wedding day was that this was the day the man she had spent so many years with became finally her husband. She thought of the man, who was her partner in life, in the good and in the bad times. He had seen it all and was still there.

It was her marriage to Luke, which had helped her through the tough times and not her Wonder Woman Stamina and a box of Twinkies. Her mother was right after all; being married made it possible to make it through the hardest of times. The moment she had broken the news of Rory's pregnancy to Luke in the bedroom after their elopement, before their well-planned wedding party, he had become her one true partner in life, who she could rely on without a second thought.

And unlike all these years ago, Lorelai didn't want her life to be any other way anymore.

THE END

* * *

 _I have to point out that I firmly believe this is NOT how Gilmore Girls would go on after A Year in the Life. To me, that's the worst-case scenario (with a dash of the best-case scenario when it comes to my little weirdo April Nardini.) I personally still hope and think Rory will have an abortion and the pregnancy will shake her up. She will change her life and finally make reasonable life decisions - because that's who or better what I ship her with._

 _Some of you may have noticed that Rory's kid has neither a gender, nor a name, which was intentional. You can add any name or gender you want, I like to give my readers some power over the story (plus the kid - to me- was never that important to the story, just a plot device)._

 _I had to write this to get it out of my system. The last four words put my world upside down and the whole full freakin' circle didn't make any sense to me. What does full circle even mean and what does it entail? That question led me to this idea. I like how it turned out. I like the strong bond Lorelai and Luke created and that their marriage got them through the tough times. I like April in this a lot. I like how Lorelai understands Emily so much better now. I like that Rory had the guts to just leave her mother and Stars Hollow behind and start her own life. And maybe some of you liked it too._

 _Thanks to everyone who took the time reading this story. I hope you enjoyed it at least a little. xxx_


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